Bringing Your Fandom Into Counseling
Updated: Oct 7
You may know exactly how to explain a character's complicated friendships and have a harder time describing what is happening in your own. Or you may simply want a therapist who will take your interests seriously without turning every favorite story into a lesson.
Your fandom can have a place in counseling. You decide whether it belongs in a particular conversation, how much background to share, and which parts you would rather keep for yourself. Here are a few ways to introduce your interests while keeping the focus on what you want help with.
Start with why it matters to you
You do not need a presentation on the entire series. A useful introduction might be, “This game is where I spend time with my closest friends,” or “There is a character whose way of handling conflict feels familiar.”
You can also explain what you want the therapist to understand:
“I want to talk about a disagreement in my gaming group without having to defend gaming first.”
“Making costumes is important to me, but I keep putting it aside for everyone else's needs.”
“I would like help feeling less embarrassed about things I enjoy.”
These are possible conversation starters, not accounts of particular clients. Your version can be shorter, messier, or unrelated to any of them.
Give your therapist a little context
Choose one detail that connects with the issue you brought to therapy. That could be a scene, a community expectation, or something you look forward to each week. If you want to share a clip or piece of writing, ask first about time, privacy, and whether it would be useful.
It is fine if your therapist does not know the source material. What matters is their willingness to listen and understand your meaning. You should not have to prove that an interest is sophisticated enough to deserve respect.
You can correct an interpretation: “That isn't the part I relate to,” or “I like that character because they're funny.” Liking a villain, choosing a certain class, or replaying a familiar story does not establish a diagnosis or reveal a hidden personal history.
Connect the discussion with something you want to change
A fandom conversation becomes useful in counseling when it helps clarify your own priorities. Suppose you admire how a character asks for support. You might consider what makes asking difficult for you and identify one person you could approach, if doing so feels safe.
The real-life step still needs planning. Confidence in a game does not automatically transfer into a difficult workplace conversation. You might need practice, a different way to communicate, or support with the circumstances around you.
The National Institute of Mental Health's psychotherapy guide recommends asking how treatment goals will be set and progress assessed. Those questions remain useful when stories or games enter the conversation.
Keep some things just for enjoyment
You can say, “I don't want to analyze this hobby.” You can also choose a different topic or decline roleplay. Therapy does not require sharing every interest or making leisure productive.
Some stories bring up difficult feelings. If discussing one leaves you overwhelmed or disconnected, pause and tell your therapist. The VA's explanation of trauma reminders describes how reminders can bring back distress; fictional distance does not guarantee that a subject will feel comfortable.
Before trying an activity, it is reasonable to ask what it is for, whether there is an alternative, and how you can stop.
How I approach your interests
I'm Dr. Corrine, the owner and therapist at Tall Grass Therapy. I offer online therapy for adults in Florida and Oregon. My background includes certification as a Geek Therapist through Geek Therapeutics.
In my geek-informed approach, games, stories, and roleplay are optional. We start with what brings you to therapy and decide together whether your interests would help us explore it. A session can also be an ordinary conversation about your life.
If you would like to explore working together, join my therapy waitlist through Paubox.
